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| Images from the St Louis, 1939, David's Friend, Romeo and Juliet, and cuny-doctoral-student Saira Rafiee, who was denied entry into the US. |
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Where
be these enemies? Capulet! Montague!
See,
what a scourge is laid upon your hate,
That
heaven finds means to kill your joys with love.
And I
for winking at your discords too.
Have
lost a brace of kinship: all are punish’d.
Last
Scene, Romeo and Juliet, William Shakespeare.
Throughout my life somebody has
always tried to set the boundaries of who and what I will be allowed to be
[...]. What is common to these boundary lines is that their most destructive power
lies in what I can be persuaded to do to myself - the walls of fear, shame, and
guilt I can be encouraged to build in my own mind. [...] I am to hide myself,
and hate myself, and never risk exposing what might be true about my life. I
have learned through great sorrow that all systems of oppression feed on public
silence and private terrorization… Dorothy Allison (1995:116-117)
I spent the weekend thinking about the ways people
come together and are then torn apart, the way we connect with each other and fate,
or history, or bigotry, or bias intervenes.
After an inauguration weekend of politics, I had
planned to spend the weekend with my
kids and family, going to see some theater, etc, David’s Friend by Nora Burns
on Saturday, Church and Romeo and Juliet on Sunday at the Clemente Soto
Vélez Cultural & Educational Center.
That was all the plan,
before we found out about Trump’s executive order banning Muslims and Refugees from
entering the country. You don’t want to spend every day reacting. But sometimes
you have to.
We are a country of
immigrants. Everyone says it. And its sad that we have to remind ourselves
about this. But we are. We came here because of religious persecution. My family came after the abuses during the
English Civil War. Thank goodness no one would have turned us back.
Caroline’s dad Al came over for dinner on Saturday and he recalled a similar story, without a happy ending:
Caroline’s dad Al came over for dinner on Saturday and he recalled a similar story, without a happy ending:
“My uncle and his
family were on
board the St Louis on the way to the US during World War II. And they were turned back. And they perished
in Auschwitz.”
Saturday, I started
hearing about the people mobilizing on their way to JKF to fight the ban, as
immigrants, CUNY students, members of extended families were being separated,
unable to pass through security at JFK.
I was on my way to see
mom. The story only grew at the day moved. More and more people going to JFK. Cleve Jones was posting about people going to
the airport, to do the same thing in San Francisco. This is the most important thing anyone can do
in San Francisco, he implored everyone.
The texts continued all
day long.
Over dinner we heard
about a judge in Brooklyn hearing the case in Cadmen Plaza. By
9 PM, I rode by as Judge Ann M Donnelly issued a stay. People with signs
were smiling. Several told me about the decision.
The ACLU has released this statement:
A federal judge
tonight granted the American Civil Liberties Union’s request for a nationwide
temporary injunction that will block the deportation of all people stranded in
U.S. airports under President Trump’s new Muslim ban. The ACLU and other legal
organizations filed a lawsuit on behalf of individuals subject to President
Trump's Muslim ban. The lead plaintiffs have been detained by the U.S.
government and threatened with deportation even though they have valid visas to
enter the United States.
We all have to support
the ACLU now, the people’s lawyers.
“There are still checks
and balances,” smiled the gentlemen introducing the evening’s performance of David’s Friend, a show at La
Mama on 74A
East 4th Street, 3rd floor.
The room applauded.
I was there with my friend Jay Blotcher, both shocked and aching
as we reflected the events of the day.
“To me, aching is the only suitable reaction by thoughtful and
principled people; only the clueless or cold-blooded can walk with head held high during these shameful days,” he lamented.
Yet, the reactions, the activism was inspiring.
“How exciting that the country reacted so powerfully this
weekend to the immigration bans,”Blotcher continued. “Such defiance and fury and solidarity.” |
We were at the theater to see:
“David’s
Friend” A story of love, loss and disco in 1980s New York City Written and
performed by Nora Burns. A comic memoir about 1980s Manhattan. The Club at La
MaMa, 74A East 4th Street, 3rd floor,
— A powerful new comic memoir about the electrifying
joy and intoxicating madness of New York City in the 1980s will take the stage
at The Club at La MaMa from January 27 through February 5, created by and
starring veteran downtown performer Nora Burns. DAVID’S FRIEND is an achingly
funny coming-of-age story about love and loss at the center of the universe:
New York City. It’s a true-life epic about Nora and David, best friends who met
as teenagers and moved to Manhattan, where they immersed themselves in the
zeitgeist: a speed-of light journey through sex, drugs, disco, love and
heartbreak. DAVID’S FRIEND is the outrageous and riotous saga of an era when rents
were cheap, sex was waiting around every corner, and friendship was the most
important thing of all.
Nora tells the story meeting her friend at a tea dance
in 1979. The two ended up staying up all night, going home together, watching
the sunset and striking off a friendship that would last the next 14 years,
best friends, really best friends, best friends who write each other love
letters tweaking in the back of clubs, best friends who dance on speakers
together, who share years together.
Watching the one act, I was struck by the raw feelings
I still have thinking about my years as club kid, some three decades prior,
expanding my ideas about borders between people, the ways we let go of hangups
when we dance together, the friends who came and went, and the losses, as the
AIDS carnage ensued.
Friendships extend beyond borders. The action was in our minds, my dad
explained, describing his relationship with his very queer best friend, who subsequently
passed of AIDS himself in 1990.
It was the wild minds, the experimental minds, the
innovative minds who we lost, early on, my friend Sarah Schulman used to say.
It was also those blurry relationships, where love
crosses over borders, between straight lines, into something richer, that
changed things.
That was my relationship with Dad and his friend who
came to live with us, before he died. I wrote
about him in Rebel
Friendships, my most recent book; and found myself thinking about the hole
in my heart as Nora recalled her friendship with David. No they were not
lovers. But their love knew no borders. In 1980, they moved from Boston to New
York, where they quickly found a pace as club kids, skipping
lines into Studio 54, Danceteria, and the Limelight, rubbing shoulders with Anthony Haden-Guest, dancing with Grace Jones, and doing as much blow
as they possibly could.
Listening,
I thought about my best friends in clubland, whose stories are just dripping
out of my old notebooks, the notes we passed to each other, high on ecstasy,
the sunrise drives home. But perfect
summers rarely last.
These
were kids who found a space for themselves, between categories, sharing
pleasure, laughs, cheap apartments, and bit of growing up together, as tea
dance became a death watch. David would not last very long into the next
decade.
Yet,
Nora has to stop and wonder why, 24 years after he passed, that his memory
still clings to her, after kids and growing.
Still, the incompleteness of the loss, that sudden disappearance, still
lingers through the years.
Its
not only a friendship but a part of her life, a part of a feeling that she can’t
get back again.
David’s
Friend is the most important of memoirs of friendship, and all its messy, boundariless
contours, that extend through time.
Finishing the
show, I found myself talking with David Weissman, the director of the Cockettes and We Were Here. We talked
about San Francisco and friends and memories of a space from a long time ago.
He told me about his days hanging out with Cleve Jones in 1979. “I was with Cleve when Harvey was inaugurated.”
I recalled my time
there sixteen years later and the feelings that linger.
There are certain gems
you never quite shake. When you are much
older they still remind you of everything you could have been or wanted to have
been or were at your best. That’s what these friends are about, that’s what
David’s Friend reminds us. Hopefully there are more friendships stories like
this. Of course, the bittersweet part is, he died in his mid-thirties, well
before his time. Love knows no borders.
But without healthcare or treatment, just living can be a trick. So we are left
with memories and separation.
So we all shared
stories. Later that night, I found myself at home where I just sat for an hour thinking about the show
and this crazy history we're living in., and then the rallies, lots and lots to
reflect on. aching.
It was hard to sleep.
Everyone knows any of us could be next in this purge.
AIDS seemed to seep into all of us
for a while there.
Its still around and so is the bias that helped fuel it.
These days, I think about Spain a
lot, the Spanish civil war and the brown shirts, who did so much damage.
When you walk around Spain you still
find burial sites where people were slaughtered and old ladies who look sad, in
these ageless downs. One wonders if their families were in those mass graves.
I hope those days are not coming.
But there were hints in the street in DC last week, military everywhere.
I can imagine marshal law at some
point.
Tt all grows from prejudice, from
bias.
There is love which extends across
borders and disputes and hopes.
And then there are the conflicts which
tear it apart.
Watching Romeo and Juliet, I found
myself thinking of the unfounded hate that seeped between the families, the Capulets and
Montagues.
“What
a Sourge is laid upon your hate.”
Pox
on all sides involved in tarnishing this love, laments Shakespeare.
The
story ends with the families suffering into truth, just as this country doesn’t seem to be able to. We
can’t learn from our history, if we don’t look at it. We fail to again and
again. Everyone knows that this cannot end well.
Watching the show, I thought of getting out into the streets to find a few of the openings and they were all there. Thousands and thousands filled the streets after the show. The uprising seems to be growing every day. The fed don’t want to support California and its sanctuary cities. So California says it won’t pay federal taxes. New York could do the same. The pressure is on.
I
rushed out to join my friends in the street, to feel a part of things for a
second. Love hadn’t conquered all in Romeo and Juliet. David died. And families
were being torn apart, separated at JFK.
“Whats
going on in this country,” my cab driver asked.
“I left Pakistan to get away from this kind of thing.”
“Well
the world hated us under Bush, loved us under Obama, and they hate us again.”
“This
is not America.”
“I
know.”
So
we hit the streets and did the only thing we knew. We walked together, striking a chord for love
in a world fanning hate.
People
carried images of Ann Frank, with song lyrics, defending the constitution and
religious freedom.
I
found one that declared: We are all Muslim, carrying that one.
My friend Elissa walked with a sign declaring: "
My friend Elissa walked with a sign declaring: "
"Daughter of an Iraqi-Jewish refugee, saved by Muslim friend. I stand with all."
“No
hate, no fear, refugees welcome here!” people chanted.
“This
is what America looks like,” others screamed, downtown full of black, brown,
and white bodies.
“Never
again,” read another. We hope not.
Riding
the subway home, I talked with a friend from Occupy.
“I’m
just scared the other shoe will drop,” I confessed. “Any of us could be next.”
“My
too,” confessed a man sitting by us.
“Next
it could be any of us.”
I
thought about the end of Romeo and Juliet when the families put their
animosities, but not after tremendous losses, their beloved kids gone forever.
They are all “poor sacrifices for our enmity.”
These
are all poor sacrifices for our hate.
But I can give thee
more:
For I will raise her statue in pure gold;
That while Verona by that name is known,
There shall no figure at such rate be set
As that of true and faithful Juliet.
For I will raise her statue in pure gold;
That while Verona by that name is known,
There shall no figure at such rate be set
As that of true and faithful Juliet.
A glooming peace this
morning with it brings;
The sun, for sorrow, will not show his head:
Go hence, to have more talk of these sad things;
Some shall be pardon'd, and some punished:
For never was a story of more woe
Than this of Juliet and her Romeo.
The sun, for sorrow, will not show his head:
Go hence, to have more talk of these sad things;
Some shall be pardon'd, and some punished:
For never was a story of more woe
Than this of Juliet and her Romeo.
Exeunt
Details
In a true show of
force, thousands of people descended upon JFK calling for the release of dozens
of refugees and immigrants who were being detained, questioned, and refused
entry to the United States.
Due to the collective efforts of advocacy groups and organizers in New York, the Federal Court for the Eastern District of New York has now issued a temporary stay halting President Donald Trump’s executive order.
The signing of President Trump's executive order has affected thousands – refugees seeking asylum and protection who have already been approved for visas, mothers and fathers barred from reuniting with their families, legal permanent residents being denied the ability to return to school or work, and refugees fleeing persecution being forced to return to their countries to death and violence.
WE CALL ON OUR COMMUNITIES TO KEEP UP THE MOMENTUM TO FIGHT THE REFUGEE AND MUSLIM BAN!
Let's make it clear that we don't just want a temporary halt, we want human rights and dignity for refugees and immigrants and we want a reversal of these inhumane executive orders NOW.
JOIN US ON SUNDAY, JANUARY 29TH at Battery Park to march to 26 Federal Plaza.
We have a permit to rally and march.
WHERE: Battery Park (West Side of Castle Clinton National Monument in Battery Park near Statue of Liberty Viewpoint) ***4, 5, 1 trains not stopping there so please make alternate plans. Castle is the meeting location**
START TIME: 2PM on SUNDAY, Jan 29th
Due to the collective efforts of advocacy groups and organizers in New York, the Federal Court for the Eastern District of New York has now issued a temporary stay halting President Donald Trump’s executive order.
The signing of President Trump's executive order has affected thousands – refugees seeking asylum and protection who have already been approved for visas, mothers and fathers barred from reuniting with their families, legal permanent residents being denied the ability to return to school or work, and refugees fleeing persecution being forced to return to their countries to death and violence.
WE CALL ON OUR COMMUNITIES TO KEEP UP THE MOMENTUM TO FIGHT THE REFUGEE AND MUSLIM BAN!
Let's make it clear that we don't just want a temporary halt, we want human rights and dignity for refugees and immigrants and we want a reversal of these inhumane executive orders NOW.
JOIN US ON SUNDAY, JANUARY 29TH at Battery Park to march to 26 Federal Plaza.
We have a permit to rally and march.
WHERE: Battery Park (West Side of Castle Clinton National Monument in Battery Park near Statue of Liberty Viewpoint) ***4, 5, 1 trains not stopping there so please make alternate plans. Castle is the meeting location**
START TIME: 2PM on SUNDAY, Jan 29th
|
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| Protesters remind us, love thy neighbor |
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